Years out from finding out my husband had affairs. Our initial issues came to a head in August 2012 and we separated. Marriage therapy for a few months and he asked for a divorce. He came back the following January and we lived apart and dated for a year, he did not tell me he had been cheating and moved back in. I was suspicious of his motives, bruised and beaten, not ready to let it all go…and I only knew half the truth.

Two years in a dysfunctional marriage I was too afraid to let myself feel or be vulnerable. 2014 I caught him with a profile online, caught him talking to women online, on the phone, cheating. Over two weeks he metered out the truth, trickle truth I am told. Here we are in 2019, we decided to try to save what we had and find a foundation to build on. Now it is about where we can go from here. Marriage is not for the faint of heart, something my mother always told me. I thought she was crazy but it has become one of my mantras.

What did we do? Individual therapy, marriage therapy, talking, emoting, blogging….throwing some spaghetti at the wall to see what sticks…